


been so long (and now i'm finally free)

by galleriesaregravity



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV), Julie and the Phantoms
Genre: Dirty Candy (Julie and The Phantoms), Enemies to Lovers, F/F, F/M, Friends to Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Misunderstandings, Nick Is A Sweetheart, Pining, Romeo and Juliet AU, SUBJECT TO CHANGE, Sort Of, bit of angst, caleb might pop in later idk yet, carrie is doing her best, carrie wilson is a repressed lesbian, i dont know how to format this, julie is a sweetheart and i love her, lots of fluff, no beta we die like men, so will juke, takes place after JATP was formed but before the orpheum, tentatively ten chapters, this quickly grew out of hand, willex will be features
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:02:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28435827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/galleriesaregravity/pseuds/galleriesaregravity
Summary: “Who wants to play Juliet?” Everybody looked to Carrie. She shifted in her seat, reveling in the fact that everyone had assumed the lead role would go to her.“I can play her,” She said, flashing another dazzling smile.Mr. Diaz nodded; he didn’t seem surprised at who offered to play Juliet. He wrote her name beside ‘JULIET’ on the paper. “Now, for Romeo. Romeo, oh Romeo.” He grinned again, scanning the room.“I’ll do it.” A voice said. There was the sound of rustling as the class turned towards the back of the room, where Flynn was sitting reclined in her seat, arms crossed over her fuzzy sweater, the sleeves pushed up to her elbows to display her several stacked bracelets.Carrie forgot how to function.-------------------------------------------------OR! In a class production of Romeo & Juliet, where Flynn and Carrie star opposite of each other, the two are forced to acknowledge not only the friendship of a time gone by, but the feelings that still remain.
Relationships: Alex Mercer/Willie (Julie and The Phantoms), Carrie Wilson & Original Character(s), Flynn & Julie Molina, Flynn/Carrie Wilson, Julie Molina/Luke Patterson, Kayla & Carrie Wilson, Nick/Carrie Wilson
Comments: 14
Kudos: 57





	1. such sweet sorrow

**Author's Note:**

> this is the first fanfic ive written in monthsss and my first jatp fanfic so!! enjoy ig! :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the title of this chapter comes from the romeo & juliet quote, "“Good night, good night! parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say good night till it be morrow.” :)

Carrie, on principle, did not think about Julie Molina or Flynn Davis. They were only reminders of a time gone by, of a past friendship that certainly wasn’t needed anymore. 

At least, that’s what she told herself. 

She still saw Julie and Flynn in the hallways, walking arm in arm, chattering about the latest history test or a substitute teacher. Carrie would let herself stare, would let herself hope, only for a moment before turning and giving Nick one of her brightest smiles. She didn’t have time to mourn her past friendships. She was far too busy, between Dirty Candy, managing her social media presence, and keeping on top of all her AP classes. Most times, she only let herself stare for a moment, if even that. She couldn’t spend all day dwelling on her ex-best friends now, anyways. Carrie had Kayla and the rest of the Dirty Candy squad now, not to mention her boyfriend. 

So no, Carrie Wilson did not think about her former best friends. And if she did, well, that was her business. 

⊹

The bell rang and Carrie stood from her desk in her chemistry class, slinging her designer purse over her shoulder. She was overdressed for school, she knew this, but she lived by the phrase _dress to impress._ Today it was a pink bomber jacket over a white ruffled camisole, and a pink skirt the exact shade of the jacket. It took her forever to find, scrounging thrift shops, designer stores, and everything in between for it. As always, bracelets were stacked on her wrists, necklaces layered around her throat. Her sunglasses were perched atop her hair, carefully styled to give it an effortless curled look. As she made her way out of the chem class, Nick was already waiting for her. He wore a varsity jacket and jeans, his Nike sneakers scuffed and a bit dirty. He glanced up from his phone when he saw her, tucking his phone into his jacket pocket as he offered her a hand. She took it, lacing their fingers together. 

“How was chem?” He asked, starting towards her next class. It was sweet, really, how he memorized her schedule after they started dating so he could walk her to each of her classes everyday. 

“Decent,” She said, examining her pink nail polish. Her left ring finger was chipping; maybe she’d ask Kayla to touch it up a bit during study hall. 

“Just decent?” Nick asked, turning to look at her. She looked back at him, at his swooping blond hair and bright blue eyes. He was smiling a bit, but when wasn’t Nick smiling? He was like a golden retriever, cute and excitable, sweet and caring. Carrie wasn’t sure what he was doing dating someone like her. 

“Just decent.” She confirmed, turning a corner. 

Julie and Flynn were there, talking at Julie’s locker. Carrie pretended she didn’t notice how their conversation ceased when she and Nick walked by. She remained quiet until they reached her English class, and if Nick noticed, he didn’t say anything.

“I’ll see you after class,” He told her, squeezing her hand once before letting go, kissing her cheek. All Carrie could do was muster up a little smile, watching him go. 

She knew she couldn’t keep deceiving everyone forever. She knew, eventually, that Nick would notice that she wasn’t as into the relationship as he was. Carrie couldn’t string him along forever. It was cruel, and Nick deserved someone better. She saw the way that Julie watched him play the guitar in band class. She saw the way Nick sought out Julie’s reaction to his performance before Carrie’s. It was only a matter of time. 

Carrie didn’t let herself think about that as she entered her English class, taking her seat in the front row and flashing her teacher a charming smile. While she was aware that she seemed like a teacher’s pet, she didn’t mind. Life was all about who you knew, and Carrie was determined to have a solid list of contacts and friends before Dirty Candy really took off. 

“Everyone take out Romeo and Juliet,” Their teacher called as Flynn skirted into the room just after the bell rang. “You’re late, Miss Davis.” He chided as Flynn slid into her seat across the room, near the back. Carrie didn’t have to look at her to know that she was giving the teacher one of her grins.

“Sorry, Mr. Diaz. Won’t happen again.” 

“That’s what you said last time.” He said, though there was no bite to his words. Everyone knew that Flynn was one of the best students in the class. 

Flynn gave a little laugh, taking out her copy of Romeo and Juliet. They were starting it that day, and their English teacher was infamous for the lengths he went to be sure they understood the material. They’d be reading the original text, a modern translation, as well as watching both the movie and stage production. Carrie wasn’t _not_ looking forward to it, but the workload seemed tedious. 

“Some housekeeping before we get into the classwork,” Mr. Diaz took a seat at his desk at the front of the room, the SmartBoard behind him. He adjusted a stack of papers as he spoke. “I’ve decided that, since we have so many talented performers in our class, we should do a performance of Romeo and Juliet.” 

The class gave mixed reactions; Carrie, personally, was thrilled. She’d done several plays when she was younger, but as she got older and focused more on music, she hadn’t really had time to return to her theatrical roots. 

“It won’t be a full scale production.” Mr. Diaz went on to assure the class. “I would just like whoever plays each character to come up to the front of the room and perform their scenes with their partners. No, you don’t need to be off-book or anything. You can keep the script in your hand. Any student who participates will be getting extra credit.” 

The class responded positively to that; extra credit was always appreciated. 

“Perfect. Now, for the cast list.” He took a piece of paper and scribbled across the top. Carrie read ‘ _Romeo and Juliet 2nd Period Cast List’._ “Let’s start small. Who wants the role of Nurse? Mercutio?” 

The roles went fairly quickly. Finally, they got the leads. 

“Micah, you will be Friar Lawrence. Who wants Juliet?” Everybody looked to Carrie. She shifted in her seat, reveling in the fact that everyone had assumed the lead role would go to her. 

“I can play her,” She said, flashing another dazzling smile. 

Mr. Diaz nodded; he didn’t seem surprised at who offered to play Juliet. He wrote her name beside ‘JULIET’ on the paper. “Now, for Romeo. Romeo, oh Romeo.” He grinned again, scanning the room.

Carrie knew that class politics were in play here. If Nick were here, as Carrie’s boyfriend, he’d be expected to play Romeo. The fact that he wasn’t here meant that the role was up for grabs, but it seemed that no one was confident enough to potentially jostle their current social standings. The air was tense. 

“I’ll do it.” A voice said. There was the sound of rustling as the class turned towards the back of the room, where Flynn was sitting reclined in her seat, arms crossed over her fuzzy sweater, the sleeves pushed up to her elbows to display her several stacked bracelets. 

Carrie forgot how to function. 

At first, she was angry. How dare Flynn, of all people, snag the role of Romeo? Carrie was certain that Flynn wasn’t a threat- not when it came to stealing the spotlight, at least- but this was so far from anything Carrie would have predicted. If anything, she figured that maybe Gio, the quiet boy in the back of the class, might have volunteered. If not him, maybe Jackson from the robotics team. After the anger faded, she was confused. Flynn had wanted nothing to do with Carrie since seventh grade, and now she wanted to star opposite of her in a class production of Romeo and Juliet? She felt herself flush red. Maybe it was an intimidation tactic, to distract Carrie from the fact that Dirty Candy and Julie and the Phantoms were officially unofficial musical rivals. Finally, she was… proud? In awe? Amazed? Carrie was all for breaking societal norms, and a female Romeo Montague was fresh. She could already see Flynn fitting so well into the role, it was almost infuriating. 

Mr. Diaz only smiled at Flynn. “You got it, Davis.” He said. Mr. Diaz always called kids by their last names; Carrie wasn’t sure why, but she didn’t hate it. 

The rest of the class went by quickly. They wouldn’t be starting their little production until the following day, which, inconveniently for Carrie, gave her time to actually think about the situation. The bell rang and she stood, slinging the purse over her shoulder as she walked out the door. Unsurprisingly, Nick was waiting for her, leaned against a locker across the hall. He looked up when the door opened and smiled. 

“How was class?” He asked, once again holding his hand outstretched towards Carrie. She took it; how could she not? 

“Okay,” she said. “We’re doing a small production of Romeo and Juliet.” 

“Let me guess,” Nick glanced at her with that smile of his. “You’re playing Juliet?” 

Carrie rolled her eyes, but there was no ill intent. “Obviously.” She said with a little smile. 

“And who will be playing Romeo?” He glanced at the halls around them. “It’s not Gio, is it?” He hid behind a smile, but Carrie could see the small insecurities in his body language. The way he squeezed her hand, probably subconsciously. The way his shoulders hunched just a bit. The way his smile faltered for only a moment before stabilizing. 

“Flynn Davis.” She told him, carefully not looking his way. She focused on the halls ahead of them, on the students parting like the Red Sea to let them pass. 

“Flynn Davis?” There was no hiding the shock in Nick’s voice. 

“Mhm. Surprised me too.” 

“And how do you… how do you feel about that?” He asked carefully. He knew all about the falling out Carrie had with Flynn and Julie. The whole school did, practically. Everyone had seen it first hand; it was at a school dance, after all. 

“Nothing.” She said. “It’s for a school assignment. Extra credit. I won’t have to talk to her or anything outside the class.” Carrie realized she was reassuring herself just as much as Nick.

“That school dance was three years ago, Car.” He said, softly nudging her shoulder with his. “Maybe she’s moved on. Maybe you guys could be friends again.” 

Carrie actually laughed. “Julie and Flynn changed. _I_ changed. We’re not the same people we were when we met in first grade. Some people grow apart. It’s just how life works.” Thankfully, they had come to Carrie’s history class. “Thank you for worrying about me, Nick, but really. It’s not a big deal.”

If her voice wavered just a bit, Nick was kind enough not to mention it. 

“Okay.” He said, kissing her cheek again. “Text me if you need anything.” Nick told her, walking backwards through the hall. He offered her one last grin before turning and going to his math class. 

⊹

“You will _never_ guess what happened in English class.” Flynn sat on the bench beside Julie, practically throwing herself onto the plastic picnic table in the school’s outdoor eating area. 

Julie took a bite of her peanut butter and banana sandwich. “You saw a tap-dancing rat?” 

“A tap-dancing _what_?”

She shrugged. “It’s the first thing I thought of. I watched Shrek the Musical with my dad last night.” 

Immediately, Flynn knew she was referring to the big act two opener where Fiona somehow dances with very gifted tap-dancing rats. 

“We’ll talk about that later,” She said with a shake of her head, unwrapping her own peanut butter and jelly sandwich. “Anyways, no. I unfortunately did not see any tap-dancing rats. I did, however, volunteer to play Romeo in Romeo and Juliet.” Flynn told Julie, taking the top slice of bread off of her sandwich, setting it on the saran wrap and opening a bag of potato chips. 

“Flynn, that’s so cool!” 

“No, no. Wait. There’s a catch.” Flynn took a chip, setting it on the sandwich. Soon, the peanut butter had a decent layer of potato chips, and she put the slice of bread back on top, effectively making a peanut-butter-and-jelly-potato-chip sandwich. 

Julie looked at Flynn, raising an eyebrow. “Which would be…?”

“Carrie is playing Juliet.” Flynn would have laughed at the way Julie almost choked on her chocolate milk had the situation not been so dire. 

“Carrie’s playing Juliet?”

“That’s what I just said, yeah.” 

“How’d that even happen?”

“She’s Carrie Wilson. It would have been even more surprising if she _didn’t_ get Juliet.” Flynn rolled her eyes. 

“Obviously, yeah, but how did you get Romeo? I mean, did you audition, or?” 

“No, we volunteered. I volunteered. For Romeo.”

“And why’d you do that?”

“Because, Julie. I’m tired of the way she always pushes us around. She thinks she’s so great because of Dirty Candy. I guess I just want to show her that we’re good, too. Really good.” 

Julie’s dark eyes softened. “Flynn, we don’t need to prove ourselves to anyone. We know we’re good. We have, like, eight thousand hits on YouTube. We don’t need Carrie’s validation, or anything else from her.” 

“I know that! My brain knows that. I just… I wanted to prove something. So, here we are.”  
“Here we are.” Julie agreed, taking another swig of chocolate milk. “Well, you’re gonna rock it as Romeo. Seriously, you’re perfect for the part. Just ignore Carrie. It’s not like you need to talk to her outside the class.”

Flynn stabbed a straw through her container of apple juice. “Yeah, you’re right. It’s just for the class.” 


	2. fortune's fool

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapters title comes from the romeo & juliet quote, "Oh, I am fortune's fool!"

Carrie let out a heavy sigh and threw open the window to the dance room on the third floor of her home. Dirty Candy was having a rehearsal, and she was exhausted. They’d been going over the choreography for a new song for two hours now, but they were making no headway. It was still sloppy; Carrie wasn’t happy with it. 

“C’mon, guys.” Carrie said, breathing in the fresh air before turning back to the girls. They looked so different from their stage personas- without the colorful wigs and flashy clothes, they looked… _normal._

Carrie didn’t like it. Carrie liked standing out. She thrived in the spotlight while others withered, a talent that she took full advantage of. 

“Car, can we take five?” Kayla asked, brushing her dark hair from her face. Her thick, straight hair was pulled back into a messy bun, but after two hours of dancing, it was more or less falling apart. 

“We can’t take five until we have this combo down.” Carrie resumed her position at the front of the room, looking at herself through the mirror. She saw doubt in her eyes, maybe a bit of anxiety. 

She turned around before she could see any more. 

“We’ve been at this for two hours.” Rebecca spoke up. She wore orange in her Dirty Candy get-up, and signified this with the amber pendant resting in the hollow of her throat. 

“And we’ll do two more hours until we get it right.” Carrie told them, bracelets jangling together as she set a hand on her hip. She quickly moved it back down by her side once she remembered the state of her nail polish; she’d forgotten to ask Kayla to help touch it up in study hall and she hadn’t gotten around to it herself, so it was even more chipped now. 

“I’ve got a family dinner in like, half an hour.” Priscilla frowned. She wore a blue headband in her fiery red hair- the girls liked wearing the signature color out of costume. 

“Then we should really get to it.” Carrie snapped. “Come on, girls. Starting positions, let’s go.” As always, she took her spot at the head of the group, head tilted up and hands on her hips, summoning up all the confidence in the world. 

“I’ll get the music.” Priscilla mumbled, grabbing Carrie’s phone. Despite having a full stereo-system in the back of the room, the girls tended to prefer just hooking someone phone up to the speaker at the front of the room. Hitting play, she scrambled back to her position. 

Kayla stood to Carrie’s right, her hip popped, one hand on her hip while the other was stretched outwards towards the audience. Rebecca mirrored her on Carrie’s left, while Priscilla was behind Rebecca and Charlotte was behind Kayla. They were always in this order- they thought that the colors compliment each other best that way. 

The music kicked up, a peppy beat with piano and strong bass. Carrie could feel the thrum of the music in her bones as she moved with the music, a bit slower than usual so the girls could catch up on the choreography. While theater and singing had been her first real passions, Carrie had a soft spot for dancing and music. Though she didn’t have time for ballet, tap, and jazz classes like she used to, she continued to choreograph each of Dirty Candy’s routines. 

Three minutes later, the routine was done. The dancing had been sloppy, but they had time to clean it up and polish it off before their next gig. 

“Okay. Okay, not awful.” Carrie said, taking a deep breath. She surveyed the team in the mirror, at the way they caught their breaths and glanced at each other. 

“Not awful? It’s the best we’ve done all day.” Charlotte spoke up, adjusting the yellow beaded bracelet over her wrist. 

“We’ve done awful today, that standard was low.” Carrie reminded them. “Let’s go through it again. Five more times and then we’re done. 

The girls groaned as they got back into their starting poses. Carrie grit her teeth as she set her hands on her hips, waiting for the music to start.

⊹

Carrie’s room was a sanctuary of sorts for her. It was painted a pale pink- she had painted it when she was eight with her mother, and hadn’t changed it yet. It reminded her of her mom, and didn’t want to sever the few things that still connected her with her mom. Her bed was pushed into the far corner, a pink duvet on top with multiple stuffed animals with it. Her furniture was all white, and a cleverly placed music box on her dresser concealed a splash of stained purple nail polish. Big windows looked out over the pool and the ocean beyond, gauzy white curtains rustling in the light Californian .breeze. Plush carpeting was underfoot, and there were shots of Dirty Candy performing hung up above her desk. There was a white keyboard in front of one of the windows, a microphone and two stands holding her violin and guitar right beside it. On the windowsill was a phone stand and ring light for when the natural lighting wasn’t as good. A large bookshelf was beside her desk, the top three shelves filled with books while the bottom three held all her notebooks and diaries. There was a vanity with her makeup, pictures of her and her dad stuck into the mirror frame. A framed photo of her and her parents was hung above her bed. Homework was still on her desk, pushed to the side and covered with music sheets. 

When inspiration struck, Carrie abandoned all things to write down her thoughts. There was a large bulletin board over her desk, covered in sticky notes and scraps of paper, lyrics or melodies scribbled down for future songs. 

At that moment though, Carrie felt anything but calm. The sun was just rising, smearing the sky in pastel purples and cotton candy pinks. She stared at herself in her mirror, dissecting every bit about her outfit. A soft pink halter top tucked into white jean shorts, a silver leather jacket on top. Her hair was curled, as it always was, but a small silver barrette held it in a half-up-half-down look. Bracelets jingled on her wrists, and she wore rings on her fingers. She frowned as she realized that she somehow still hadn’t gotten around to fixing her nail polish. 

“Carrie! Let’s go!” Her father called from downstairs. She slipped into pink shoes that matched her shirt, with enough heel to give her a few more inches in height but not be uncomfortable. 

“Coming!” She yelled down the stairs, quickly putting on silver star earrings and heading down the stairs. “Ready to go.” 

Trevor was waiting by the door, keys in hand, as he bit out of a green apple. He always drove her to school; he was busy a lot, so the five minute drive was their designated time together. Today though, they were silent. 

“Got an email from Diaz about a Romeo and Juliet production thing.” Her father said at a red light two minutes into the drive.

“Yeah. I’m Juliet.” 

“That’s my girl.” He grinned. “Which lucky guy gets to be Romeo?”

“Flynn Davis.” Carrie crossed her arms over her chest, looking out the window. 

“Flynn Davis? Your Flynn Davis?” 

“Not _my_ Flynn Davis. We stopped talking in middle school. Remember?” 

How could Trevor forget? Carrie had been inconsolable that night. He’d gotten a call begging him to come pick her up from the dance, and she sobbed the entire way home. They spent that night binging The Princess Diaries and eating mint chocolate chip ice cream. He called out of his early-morning conference with some music producers the next day, just to spend it with Carrie.

“Right.” He nodded. “Well, you’re a good actress. You’ll do great.” They pulled into the school, and Carrie nodded. 

“Thanks. See you later. Love you.” She leaned over the center console to kiss his cheek before getting out of the car, not surprised to see Nick waiting for her at the school doors. He held a large iced coffee in his hand, and offered it to her as she approached. 

“Figured today might be a little stressful with the whole Romeo and Juliet thing, so.” He shrugged, a shy smile on his face as he held out the coffee.

Carrie never thought that an iced coffee could make her cry. 

“Nick, I owe you my life.” She said, gratefully accepting the coffee and taking a sip as Nick slipped his hand into hers. He grinned, looking pleased with himself. 

“Nah, just knock it out of the park with the performance.” He told her. 

“It’s not even really a performance,” Carrie reminded him. “Just reading the play in front of the class.

“Yeah, it might start off like that, but I heard Mrs. Lessa and Mrs. Harrison got word and they’re coming to check it out,” He said. At Carrie’s shocked expression, he cocked his head. “What, you didn’t hear?” 

“No,” She shook her head, frowning. “What does- what does that _mean_?” 

Nick shrugged. “Dunno. Maybe they’ll turn it into a full-scale production.” 

“A full scale- _no_. I can’t work with Flynn for more than necessary.” At that point, they were outside Carrie’s class. 

“Car, listen to me.” Nick said, turning to face her. “You’re an amazing actress. You’re talented and professional. Whatever happens, you’ll get through it.” 

She gave a small smile. “Thanks, Nick.”  
“That’s what boyfriends are for.” He grinned. “By the way, I can’t hang out after school. Nora has requested my presence at a fairy princess tea party.” Every so often, Nick’s sister would coerce him into having a tea party with her. Not that it took much convincing- Nick loved Nora. 

“That’s sweet. Have fun.” She smiled, kissing his cheek. Normally, she let Nick do all the romantic stuff, but she felt like she needed to thank him for the iced coffee. 

“I will.” He flashed a grin, walking backwards down the hall before he turned the corner. Carrie entered her class- first period history- and waited for third period English. She was dreading it. Not the actual performing part- really, Carrie was born to perform- but the whole performing-opposite-of-Flynn thing. Once upon a time, Carrie knew everything about Flynn. Now, she didn’t even know her favorite color. 

⊹

“Okay, kiddos! Let’s get into it.” Mr. Diaz called, clapping once to get their attention. Carrie glanced around the class, noting the absence of Mrs. Lessa and Mrs. Harrison. Hopefully, the rumors that Nick heard were wrong. “We’re gonna start off at the very beginning. Narrator! Where’s our narrator?”

A sheepish girl with thick blonde braids and circular glasses made her way to the front of the room. 

“Alright, Emilia. Whenever you’re ready.” 

Carrie pulled out her own script. The night before, she went through and highlighted all of Juliet’s lines. She was nothing if not prepared.

“... A pair of star-cross'd lovers take their life; Whose misadventured piteous overthrows. Do with their death bury their parents' strife.” Emilia’s voice was flat as she read. She lacked emotion. Carrie could see how nervous she was from the way she fidgeted with the hem of her magenta sweater, shifting her weight every few seconds. At least she didn’t stutter. 

The rest of class went more or less the same. It felt like an eternity before they got to Romeo’s first lines; Carrie knew that Juliet wouldn’t show up until later. 

Flynn cleared her throat and made her way to the front of the room. She wore a deep purple dress with silver biker shorts beneath. Over top was a jean jacket, fur lining the cuffs and lapels. With black sneakers and layered necklaces, Carrie thought she looked… good. Really good. She shifted in her seat and crossed her arms over her chest and Flynn prepared to read her lines. 

“Is the day so young?” She read, and, if Carrie was being quite honest, she was a good actress. Carrie shouldn’t have been surprised, as she, Flynn, and Carrie all used to do community theater together. Still, it was surprising to see that Flynn had retained her skills. 

Carrie shifted in her seat, crossing her right leg over her left knee. She was getting restless. As Flynn and the others acted out the scene, she flipped through her own copy. Romeo and Juliet don’t meet until scene five; she wondered why she had been so anxious for it. Shakespeare wrote lengthy scenes. They probably wouldn’t even get to scene five until next week. Carrie couldn’t help but smile smugly as she situated back in her seat. 

⊹

To absolutely nobody’s surprise, the following week came much more quickly than Carrie would have liked. Before she knew it, she was seated on a stool at the front of the room, script in hand. That day, she’d chosen a more simple outfit: an off-the-shoulder pastel pink dress that stopped just above her knees, and chunky white sneakers. Of course, her jewelry was perfect, as was her hair, where she wore a silver headband with little silver flowers adorning it. 

Flynn was seated across from her, wearing ripped mom jeans with fishnets underneath, and a bulky green sweater. Her braids were splayed over her shoulders, decorated with silver cuffs, and Carrie couldn’t help but let her gaze linger on the way they framed her face. 

She snapped herself out of it. She couldn’t afford to think like that, not with her amazing, loving boyfriend and her promising career with Dirty Candy. 

“Alright, go ahead.” Diaz said from the back of the classroom, where he was observing. 

Flynn took a deep breath, glancing at Carrie before back down at the script. 

“If I profane with my unworthiest hand. This holy shrine, the gentle fine is this: My lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand. To smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss.”

Flynn didn’t stutter over her words. She didn’t hesitate or miss a beat. For God’s sake, she sounded like she was born to spout Shakespeare. 

Carrie did _not_ blush. It wasn’t even like it was Flynn was speaking- these were words written hundreds of years ago by a man who had been dead for centuries. 

“Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much, which mannerly devotion shows in this; For saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch, and palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss.” Carrie was prepared, too. She’d practiced the night before with Nick, who, ever the patient boyfriend, had read out Romeo’s lines with a dramatic flair. 

The rest of the scene was going by well until the classroom door opened. Flynn, who was in the middle of her lines, glanced up, her eyes promptly widening. Carrie pursed her lips and frowned, glancing over her shoulder to the door. 

“Sorry,” Mrs. Lessa was stage whispering with a little smile, Mrs. Harrison following her. “Go on.” She told Flynn, motioning with her hand for her to continue. Flynn, to her credit, was not as thrown off by the principle and drama teacher as Carrie felt. 

Apparently, those rumors Carrie had heard from Nick were not just rumors- they were very real, and it was happening, _now._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hehe :) 
> 
> comments are v appreciated!!


	3. my only hate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> title from the romeo & juliet quote, "my only love sprung from my only hate." :)

Flynn punctuated her point by slamming her chocolate milk carton onto the plastic picnic table. “And  _ then-  _ get this-  _ then _ Lessa and Harrison walk in! I’m like, what? And I can tell Carrie was thinking that too, because she looked just as surprised as me. Then- you’re gonna love this part- they’re like, ‘wow, we’d love to make this a full-scale, school production’!” Flynn shook her head, propping her elbow up on the table, resting her cheek in her hand. 

“Wow.” Julie nodded, sipping from her orange juice. Luke, Alex, and Reggie were all sitting at the lunch table as well, though only Julie could see them.

“I don’t get why she’s complaining.” Reggie loudly announced, setting his hands palm-down on the table. “She’s playing  _ Romeo.  _ Isn’t that, like, a big deal?” 

Alex let out a heavy sigh, rolling his eyes as Luke playfully smacked Reggie upside the head. Alex drummed his index fingers against the table, so mindlessly that Julie wasn’t sure he was even aware he was doing it. “Were you even listening? She doesn’t like Carrie, remember?” 

“I don’t see why not,” Reggie shrugged, a dopey grin tugging at his lips. “She’s hot.” 

“Christ, dude.” Alex replied, shaking his head. Julie stifled a laugh before turning back to Flynn.

“Listen, Flynn. You’re a great Romeo. We practiced for hours. You’re probably ready to perform, like, now.”  
Flynn held up a hand to stop her. “Slow down. I never said that I agreed to be in the school production. They said that participation in that was optional and would not affect our English grade.” 

“So you’re not doing it?”

“I didn’t say that either.” She shrugged non-committedly, popping a soggy french fry into her mouth. 

“So what  _ are _ you saying?”

“Make up your mind, girl.” Reggie chastised. Julie ignored him. 

“I’m saying that I haven’t decided yet.” Flynn said. Reggie groaned, tipping his head back dramatically. 

“Well, is Carrie doing it?” 

“Probably.” Flynn shrugged again- she seemed to do that a lot when they talked about Carrie Wilson, like she couldn’t care less. 

“Alright. Do you want to do it with her?”

“No.” 

“Okay. So don’t do it. Not that difficult.” 

“No, no, no. I can’t let Carrie go on and do it without me. That’s like… giving up. Surrendering. And I do  _ not  _ give up.” Flynn shook her head passionately as she spoke, the little cacti on her earrings shaking along with her. 

“Alright, so you’re doing it.”

Flynn was silent for a moment, contemplating. “I guess.” She finally gave in, but she didn’t look too happy about it. 

“Flynn Davis, our very own Romeo Montago!” Reggie grinned, looking triumphant. 

“Montague.” Alex corrected. Reggie ignored him. 

“The guys are excited for you,” Julie told Flynn. “We’ll all be there opening night. We’re very excited.”

“Heck yeah!” Luke laughed, clapping Alex and Reggie on the back. They all grinned like doofuses, and Julie felt a surge of love in her chest for them all. 

“The guys are here?” Flynn asked, looking around the table. She focused on the seats across from them, contemplating.

“Alex. Reggie. Luke.” She guessed, pointing to where she thought they night be. 

“Reggie, Luke, Alex.” Julie corrected, pointing to where the boys actually were.

“I’ll get it one of these days.” She shrugged with a little smile, finishing off her fries. 

⊹

“I told Lessa and Harrington that I’d do the production.” Carrie told Nick. They were seated in her living room, a cheesy rom-com playing on the TV. She was tucked up against Nick, his arm around her as a gentle sea breeze floated in through the opened windows. 

“I knew you would.” Nick smiled. “You’ll be the perfect Juliet. We rehearsed for hours. You’re practically off book already.” 

“I know.” Carrie said with a little half-smile. “I’m excited. I haven’t heard if Flynn is doing it yet, though.” 

“Doesn’t matter if she is.” He said. “You’ll knock it out of the park either way.” 

“I know. I just… don’t know.” She said softly. 

“That’s okay. You’re an actress. Pretending… it’s what you do. Just pretend to like Flynn.”

Carrie almost scoffed. “I can’t. We don’t like each other. It's a mutual thing.”

“You don’t need to pretend around me.” Nick’s voice was soft. Carrie hated how it made her feel; soft and mushy and entirely guilty. 

“I’m not pretending.”  
“You are.” 

“I’m not.” 

“Carrie. Talk to me.” His voice was gentle- almost pleading. 

Against her better judgement, Carrie felt herself softening. She shifted closer to Nick, offering a small shrug. “We’ve barely spoken since seventh grade Winter Formal, and suddenly, we’re co-stars? Playing  _ love interests _ ? It’s a big jump.” 

“No one’s expecting you to be okay with it.” Nick told her, running his hand up her arm. Despite the Californian warmth, she felt herself get goosebumps. 

“Good.” She muttered. “Because I’m not.  _ We’re _ not. I know Flynn isn’t okay with it either.” 

“Then you have to come to a mutual understanding. Act civil for the show, then you can go back to… feuding, or whatever it is you two do.” 

“Three. Don’t forget Julie.” 

Nick was silent for a beat longer than normal. Carrie glanced up at him; he looked pensive. “Julie isn’t as intense as Flynn. I doubt that she feels as strongly as Flynn does.” 

Carrie didn’t miss the subtle defensive tone in his voice. She was confused for a moment, before she remembered all those glances in the hallways, the longing look in Julie’s eyes when they walked down the hall hand in hand, the way Nick always looked for her when they walked into the music room. A sour feeling twisted in her gut, but it wasn’t jealousy, per se. She knew she didn’t get to claim Nick after dragging him along all these months, knowing she had no real feelings for him. But breaking up with Nick, admitting that to him, that made it  _ real. _ That made everything  _ real _ and Carrie didn’t want to deal with that, not yet, not right now. 

She guessed she was quiet for too long, because Nick cleared his throat. “What I meant is, I don’t think Julie holds grudges the same way Flynn does.” 

“Maybe.” Carrie said, unable to hide the sharp edge to her voice. She internally winced after hearing her own tone; it wasn’t right for her to take out her anger on Nick. He was a literal angel, and here Carrie was, just pulling him along and leading him on. Her gaze lingered back to her nail polish, still chipped. She scowled at it.

“Sorry. I know you guys aren’t on the best terms since…” He trailed off. 

“You can say it. You don’t need to act like I’m fragile. It’s been three years.” 

“I know. I just, you know. Don’t wanna bring up bad memories.” 

“Thanks to Flynn playing Romeo, those ‘bad memories’ are all I’ve been able to think about.” Even Carrie didn’t miss the acidic tone to her words. 

“I’m sorry.” Nick said, at a loss for words. That’s when Carrie knew she messed up. Nick was always swooping in to save the day, fixing awkward situations and making everybody feel at ease. She realized there were things even Nick couldn’t fix. Carrie just shrugged. “I, uh, better get going.” Nick stood, glancing down at Carrie, who was still seated on the white couch. 

“Yeah.” She nodded. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to…” She shrugged, not even sure what she’d call it. It wasn’t a lash out, wasn’t a break down. Still, it was something, something that Nick didn’t deserve the bear the brunt of. 

“It’s fine.” Nick said, leaning down to press a quick kiss to the top of her head. “Just try to look on the bright side, okay? Silver lining, and all that.” 

“Yeah, I will. Thanks, Nick.” He nodded, turning on his heel. Just like that, he was gone. Just like that, Carrie was alone. 

⊹

The night of the seventh grade Winter Formal was unusually cold for California. The cool seaside breeze, usually a relief from the unrelenting sun during the summer, only served to draw shivers from the students waiting outside Los Feliz High School. Students were dressed to the nines, wearing sparkly dresses and dazzling suits, hair done to perfection, accessories painstakingly picked out to match outfits. 

Carrie Wilson wore a lilac colored dress with floral lace on the bodice and a satin ribbon around the waist. Trevor had helped her curl her hair, resulting in him burning his finger only once, which was a personal best for the both of them. With silver flats and a silver bracelet, Carrie felt… beautiful. She felt beautiful and confident, if a little anxious.

Flynn Davis had opted not to wear a dress. Not because she couldn’t totally rock one, but because she felt like a pantsuit would stick it to the man much better. (Her words). Instead, she wore a pantsuit set, with magenta dress shorts and a matching blazer, a black shirt tucked into the shorts. Her hair was in its usual braids, only they were much shorter, only to her shoulders. Carrie remembered thinking that Flynn had looked amazing that night, and told her so, several times. The first time they all saw each other for pictures at Carrie’s place before the dance, they had all squealed, shouting compliments. 

Julie Molina’s mother had helped her pick out a turquoise dress, with rhinestones on the bodice and a hi-low skirt. Her hair was straightened, a process that took  _ hours  _ with the help of Tia Victoria. Blood, sweat, and tears were shed to make her hair that smooth and shiny. There was a silver headband holding her hair back, and silver fingerless gloves that she said added a “pop of color”. Mrs. Molina had been the one to drop the girls off at the dance, with smiles and the promise to see them at 10:30 when she picked them up. 

“It’s taking forever to get in.” Flynn had commented, stretching her neck to peer over the shoulders of the people in line in front of them. 

“They’re probably making sure everyone’s tickets are legit.” Julie suggested. 

“Yeah, ‘cause everyone knows a middle school formal is the place to be.” Carrie laughed, friendly sarcasm tainting her voice. 

“With us here, obviously.” Flynn grinned. 

“Line’s moving up!” Julie announced, taking their hands and tugging them forward. The line moved quickly from then on, and they flashed their tickets to the high schoolers working the booth for community service hours, before entering the gym. 

It was decked out in blue and maroon balloons, with streamers hanging from the ceiling. A booth was set up at the far end, bracketed with speakers, a DJ set in the middle. Music blasted over the low murmur of conversing students. Only a few couples had braved the dance floor as of yet, but as the night went on, Carrie was sure that would change. 

“Drinks.” Flynn said. “I’ll get drinks. You guys go grab us seats.” With that she turned on her heel and headed for the refreshments table. Julie looked to Carrie with a shrug as they headed towards the tables set up at one side of the gym. They had arrived early enough where they could nab a table of their own, and claimed it. Flynn joined them a few minutes later, carefully balancing three clear plastic cups of red fruit punch. 

“Here we go, ladies!” She grinned, setting them down and sliding in between Carrie and Julie. “What’s up first for the night? Dancing? Gossiping?” 

The night was going smoothly- as smoothly as a middle school dance could go. The girls had made their way out to the dance floor, dancing through the Cotton Eye Joe, the Cupid Shuffle, the Cha-Cha Slide, the YMCA. They stumbled over the steps and giggled over the loud music thrumming through their bones. 

Flynn didn’t think she’d ever been as happy as she was that night, at their first real school dance with her best friends. 

It didn’t last. Things like that-  _ good _ things- they rarely do. It started when a song came on; Flynn honestly can’t remember which one, anymore. It had become so insignificant, especially compared to the later details of the night. 

“I love this song!” Julie had exclaimed, raising her hands as she danced along. 

‘This song’s annoying,” Carrie had said moments after, before she even processed Julie’s words. Julie looked at her, shaking her head. 

“You just don’t understand it.” She said with a light smile, hair bouncing as she danced. “It’s a musical  _ masterpiece.” _

Flynn wasn’t sure why Carrie took it to heart, but she did. Looking back, Carrie wasn’t entirely sure, either. “Please, my music taste is way better than yours.” She had scoffed, rolling her eyes. As Julie had jumped to the rhythm, Carrie’s feet remained firmly planted on the gym floor. 

“Is not!” Julie tried playing it off, but there was genuine confusion and just a bit of hurt in her voice as she tried to figure out what she’d said wrong. They never joked about music.

“If you write songs like this one, they’ll never get big.” Carrie’s words were matter-of-fact, like hers often were. While Julie used dreams as her muse, Carrie’s songs were inspired by her world. Julie’s songs were what could be; Carrie’s songs were what was. 

“What?” Flynn looked to Carrie, surprised by the sudden turn of events. 

“Why would you say that?” Julie asked, ceasing to jump and dance along. Her fingers didn’t so much as twitch in time with the song. 

“I’m keeping it real.” Carrie said, a hand on her hip. 

“Carrie, c’mon.” Flynn reached out a gentle hand to Carrie’s arm, but she only flinched away. 

“No,” Carrie said, her dark eyes turning to Flynn. “No. I’m tired of Julie getting to live in the clouds all day while we go through  _ real  _ life. She can’t- she can’t stay up there forever.” Her voice had accelerated as she spoke, and soon there was a crowd around them, watching them argue. 

_ Fight.  _ They were fighting. They never did that. Triple Trouble- that’s the name they had given themselves in the fifth grade, after Julie and Flynn had been Double Trouble for so long. 

“What’s gotten into you?” Julie had asked, stepping forward with a frown tugging at her lips. 

“Nothing, Julie. Nothing. I just know what it’s like in the real world. Songs like that? They don’t make it big. Not like mine will.” 

Julie reached out for Carrie, sensing that something more was going on. “Carrie.” 

“Don’t  _ touch _ me!” Her voice went louder, more high-pitched. The DJ stopped the music, looking around in confusion, probably for Principle Lessa. 

“Carrie, please.” Julie tried again, but Flynn shook her head. Carrie didn’t get to be all buddy-buddy with them one minute, and furious at them the next. That’s not how Triple Trouble worked. 

“Cut it out, Carrie.” Flynn said, hands on her hips. Julie turned to Flynn in surprise, not expecting the edge to her voice. “We get it. Things are different for you than they are for Julie. But Julie writes _ good _ music.  _ Really _ good music, and she’ll make it big one day, no matter what style music she writes. You’re just jealous because your music isn’t half as good.” She practically spat the words. 

The thing with Flynn was, she was never not going to stand up for her friends. She had stood up for Carrie multiple times, but never expected to be standing up  _ to _ Carrie. The words she said- they weren’t true, not completely. Carrie and Julie had very different experiences: True. Julie wrote very good music: True. Carrie’s music wasn’t half as good: False. Very false. Flynn regretted the words as soon as she said them, but the damage was done. 

Anger flickered in Carrie’s eyes, then hurt. 

“You think people want songs about rainbows and unicorns? No. People want songs about things they can  _ relate _ to. Like real life, not wherever Julie is.” She spat, refusing to show just how much Flynn’s words had cut her. She didn’t want to give Flynn that little victory.

“You don’t get to act all hurt when you’re the one who started it.” Flynn said, before she could stop herself, or even think about her words. “You started something. I’m finishing it.” 

“Who’s side are you  _ on _ ?” Carrie had asked, voice cracking. They had always been on the same side. Julie, Flynn, and Carrie against the world, against that god-awful English sub, against the boys on the football team who thought they were so much better than everyone else. 

“You don’t get to make me choose.” Flynn told her, voice scarily cool and even. “Because if you do, I will choose Julie. I will choose Julie, everytime.” 

The silence in the gym was palpable, the crowd of party-goers frozen in confusion and morbid interest. The AC kicked on, a humming sound filling the gymnasium, but nobody moved. 

“Fine.” Carrie finally said, looking between Julie and Flynn. Julie looked devastated, brows knit in anxiety, lips twitching downwards in a broken frown. Flynn was unmoving, hiding her emotions from anybody who may try to read them. Julie used to joke that between Flynn and Carrie, with all their defenses, it was hard to get all mushy and sappy with anyone in their group. She was right; neither Carrie or Flynn would budge. 

Carrie turned on her heel, grabbing her purse from their table before calmly walking out of the gym. It was only when the heavy doors latched shut behind her that she took off in a run for the girls’ bathroom, fingers trembling as she pulled up her father’s contact. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there will be a lot more background on the fight in later chapters- motives, what started it, etc etc!

**Author's Note:**

> you can find me on tumblr at wcrld-is-mine and on discord at starrynights#0652 !


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